So... we're back. After fifteen months of an exclusive tour of both Americas, Europe, Asia, and the exotic sub-continent. I'd like to think we're a little older and a little wiser. Well, older certainly. Thats really what I want to talk about here, time. Treasure it, bide it, spend it in whatever way makes you happy, but remember that with every day that goes by you've got less of it left. So use it as best you can. That girl you've had your eye (or eyes) on for a while, ask her out next chance you get. The disputes and old hatreds you've been nursing, settle them quickly. Hell, even hurry up and complete that old save-game in FFX that you never got around to finishing. Stop hiding from life because you're afraid of the future. You might not have anything but time on your hands, but you still haven't got time to waste.
We have much to do, and less time to do it in.
March 29, 2003
Due to the recent and over-whelming popularity of reality TV shows, I have decided to sell out and cash in. I'm going to call in "Morningstar Search" It's gonna rock. We bring in one hundred random people from all walks of life (while still meeting qotas of racial, ethnic, and sexual diversity) and test them against the Anglo Christian Prophecys concerning the rebirth of the Dark One himself, Satan. Imagine the exciting tests of skill and inane talent. Things like the cross toss, where contestants see who can hurl a holy emblem the furthest without having their hands burned off by the wrath of God. Or maybe bobbing for apples-in holy water. In round two, we see which contestants can survive banishment in our super special custom made "Inferno Chamber." The final round will be a no-holds-barred brawl with our celebrity guest, the Archangel Micheal. Our winner will be awarded fame, fortune, and the souls of all Humanity as He rises to power anew and washes over the earth in a tidal wave of blood and endless torment.
April 9, 2003
So...with Tristen no longer ranting I imagine you'll be expecting me to have even more inane, backwards, or just generally bent things to fill this massive yawing space at the bottom of the strip. Or, as the French call it, Le Big Mac. Well guess what, pions, you wanted me and you're going to get all you can handle. You're gonna be eating obscure literary refrences and pop cultural hostility for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Big Daddy Dante is gonna put you through hell! You'll have to read my ramblings until your eyes bleed, and then when you're in the hospital for said eye bleeding, the nurses will come in and read my ramblings to you. That will porbably make your ears bleed as well, in which case we'll try brail! Ah ha ha! Ah ha ha! No matter what you do, or where you go, I....SHALL....BE....HEARD!!!
April 22, 2003
We're both very proud of this strip. It includes all the best parts of Malice's: sheer randomness, sharp wit, obscure (not very) cultural references, a large sword, and hard liqour. Apart from that it is shockingly well drawn and will likely raise the bar for all other webcomics online today. How good is it? Well, on a scale from Zero to Dante, we've got two.
After coloring this, I have an intense urge to play Devil May Cry 2 again. Which leads to an intense urge to say something in the games defense. It's not the original. Everyone who dislikes it because it's not just the same as the original should bare in mind that it shouldn't be the same as the original because then as a sequel it wouldn't be very original.